December 11, 2010
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I've said multiple times before on here that a majority of my friends tend to be girls. Given that, it shouldn't be surprising to learn that most (if probably not all, considering that's a small number anyway) of my closest friends are girls. Add to that that some (*cough*Vikki*cough*) and I have no concept of personal space/information, I've grown used to not having to deal with the irritating phenomenon of being treated as "the male in the room" for several years now.
Maybe it was the slightly absurd notion of having to talk in code about what are day-to-day concepts and topics or the rediculous general-feeling about actually dismissing something as girl talk - or, perhaps, I've just become so used to not encountering such treatment for so long that I suddenly feel like I'm back in Sophomore year of high school when it occurs these days. Or maybe it's just my age-old dislike at feeling like I'm shoved to the outside circle of, well, anything, let alone a friend or someone I have affinity for.
I need to get home, to normalcy, to enviroments I'm thoroughly used to. This week is going to be one of the longest of my life.
Comments (2)
Bear in mind someone like me in Dear Abby mode might have a better intention than competency. We singly are a representation of people in general and of every other person in particular. We all want to Belong. Nobody wants to be Outside. But--every applicant to the Group carries the whiff of the Outside they’re all trying to flee.. And it doesn’t fade away with age
You will find as you get older your resilience will increase. And your Group will shift as you change where you work and live. You--and every person--are / is a bundle of contradictions. We have equal need for acceptance and solitude. We have equal capacity to accept and rebuff. And every now and then some big trauma will reset your meter and you will feel like a poor lonely kid again.
I don’t know if that helps. Or if this will help: you are in my thoughts. I see the avatars and usernames of the people I know here and a couple other places. Some of us are at multiple sites. When I see the visible representations, I remember that there people behind them. I lift them up in my thoughts. I wish them well and hope the best for them. A Good Vibes / prayer kind of thing.
Yep, yep! Come home now. :]
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